Wednesday, January 11, 2012
After 3 years of everything conceivable getting worse for Americans, even Barack Obama's supporters are starting to ask him what the "Hope" and "Change" he promised was supposed to be. Pressed for a definition of these vague terms, Obama has now clarified "Osama bin Laden will never again walk the face of this Earth. That’s what change is!"
OHhhhhh! Somehow when he was describing "Change" during the campaign, we assumed it would involve less brain matter spattering across walls at high velocity.
Of course, he also promised "Change" in the tone of rhetoric in Washington - and he's certainly delivered on that score, too - by making it exponentially worse. In the same speech in which he was licking Osama's blood off his alleged trigger finger, the president said that evil Republicans are putting "the very core of what this nation stands for on the line. The notion that we're all in this together, that we look out for each other."
Frankly, it strikes us as odd that the president claims "we're all in this together," while trying to incite half of the country to take up arms against the other half. Maybe we don't quite understand his definition of "looking out for each other."
And what are we to make of Obama's accusation that Republicans are against people succeeding "no matter what you look like?" Seriously, if he was any faster at whipping out the race card, he'd be dealing Blackjack in Vegas.
But at least we don't actually have anything to fear from Barack Obama's violent new definition of "Change" as killing your political enemies - right?
Maybe yes, maybe no. Because Homeland Security has now been tasked with collecting personal information and keeping data banks on anyone in the country who uses "traditional and/or social media in real time to keep their audience situationally aware and informed."
Which means there's a pretty good likelihood that they're keeping an eye on Hope n' Change Cartoons.
I just hope that there won't be an ugly midnight visit from Seal Team Six when they find out that my real name is Bill Maher.